Living in two places offers the best of both worlds, but I've said it before - it also makes me wish to be in exactly the place that I am NOT. As news broke yesterday about the huge earthquake and tsunamis in Japan, I kept wishing that we weren't here right now. I was wishing that we were in Seattle. Of course Seattle has had it's own share of quakes. But the grass is always greener elsewhere.
Lately this has been the metaphor for my life. I love my kids. I do. But I can't stop thinking about the time before they were in my life. The time before we spent 14 months trying to get pregnant. The time when I could go out and do errands without having to take a diaper bag along. The time when I could have a glass of wine and watch a movie before falling asleep at night rather than passing out each evening as soon as both kids are finally asleep (at least for the 1st time of the night - nevermind the multiple wake-ups all night long).
And yet. I don't want to trade any of my experiences. I don't truly want to go back to a time before the girls. How sad that would be. As the littlest one peeks out at me and plays peek-a-boo right this moment I can't imagine a sweeter smile.
Not living in Japan for at least some of the time, would mean a totally different lifestyle for us as well. I am amazed at how quickly Peanut has fallen into using Japanese again - with flair. Just a few weeks in preschool here and she has gained a confidence and fluency both with the language and socially as well. Feeling more comfortable with the language and her new friends at the school, she is starting to shine.
Do I hope and pray that we won't have more earthquakes here right now? Of course. But I can't really imagine not being here either.